Hey yo~^^ new post posted~
here it goes:
It doesn't even matter
Either way you are
As long it's the way you are
You're gonna always so amazing
Whether people like it or not
Always remember that it's important
To love yourself and
For sure
Someone's gonna like you
No matter what way you are
As it doesn't even matter!!
Come on...lalala~
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
it seems ntg yet kinda busy =S
hey there, gues its been a while for me till now finally have the idea abt wat to type =)
well, 1st, ever since before cny, it seemed like my luck was not so well yet kinda bad such as especially my monetary issue T.T It's rare for me having such issue as when I saw my account is drying out while some so-called "toll" keep sucking my money at the same time...and then I noticed, seriously it's a pain to take care a car etc....and just a car oni, not even with wife or children (though I'm stil single), I'm already having migraine of how to continue the life dy....somehow now, as for now larrr.....maybe single's life not bad also~hehe...no nid buy those presents or some others stuffs for the other one or maybe eat with the other one....however, seriously, as a person who's been single since he was born, the desperation level of having a girlfriend is indeed f**king high =.=!!
2nd, now is the moment tat can be considered as the middle stage of my last chapter of my diploma story. honestly, never expect it's a term tat gives me the highest stress level even it doesnt have the highest number of subjects to be learnt n so n so....can say tat oni one assignment can send me to the lowest level of the mountain....well..or maybe defined as hopeless? @.@
3rd, had my 1st foreign country trip in my life and the 1st forein country visited was taiwan. basically the trip was quite nice jz tat maybe i'm too emo or other influences, for me tat time was like "ntg" yet seriously afterall,on the other hand, i felt tat the trip was kinda interesting...kinda conflict isn't ....ahh...i'm so blur n lost @.@ ^^n one thg for me to share is taiwan is the place tat having better lifestyle yet the spending power is high as well. if one cant control the spending, for sure the money will never be enough to0 be used no matter how much one owns...
well, gues tats all for now, hope tat after tis post, my life mayb can go easier?? hehe....be happyn positive for me n everyone.....and last but nt least,
hope you don't mind....HAPPY BELATED CNY N VALENTINE'S DAY!!!=)
well, 1st, ever since before cny, it seemed like my luck was not so well yet kinda bad such as especially my monetary issue T.T It's rare for me having such issue as when I saw my account is drying out while some so-called "toll" keep sucking my money at the same time...and then I noticed, seriously it's a pain to take care a car etc....and just a car oni, not even with wife or children (though I'm stil single), I'm already having migraine of how to continue the life dy....somehow now, as for now larrr.....maybe single's life not bad also~hehe...no nid buy those presents or some others stuffs for the other one or maybe eat with the other one....however, seriously, as a person who's been single since he was born, the desperation level of having a girlfriend is indeed f**king high =.=!!
2nd, now is the moment tat can be considered as the middle stage of my last chapter of my diploma story. honestly, never expect it's a term tat gives me the highest stress level even it doesnt have the highest number of subjects to be learnt n so n so....can say tat oni one assignment can send me to the lowest level of the mountain....well..or maybe defined as hopeless? @.@
3rd, had my 1st foreign country trip in my life and the 1st forein country visited was taiwan. basically the trip was quite nice jz tat maybe i'm too emo or other influences, for me tat time was like "ntg" yet seriously afterall,on the other hand, i felt tat the trip was kinda interesting...kinda conflict isn't ....ahh...i'm so blur n lost @.@ ^^n one thg for me to share is taiwan is the place tat having better lifestyle yet the spending power is high as well. if one cant control the spending, for sure the money will never be enough to0 be used no matter how much one owns...
well, gues tats all for now, hope tat after tis post, my life mayb can go easier?? hehe....be happyn positive for me n everyone.....and last but nt least,
hope you don't mind....HAPPY BELATED CNY N VALENTINE'S DAY!!!=)
Sunday, January 23, 2011
It's killling me
Urgh! They've been kinda tough weeks to pass through...since the 1st week of class, and now the 4th week, which means, there're assignments that given since then are reaching the deadline--this friday!!! And OMG, didn't even touch a single fur of them!! What I've been doing lately?? NTG?? Ridiculous! Dang! Gonna figure out somehow and hopefully can finish by tmr which is Monday as it's an OFF day I suppose...
On wednesday, it was supposingly a quite nice day yet some shits happened and spoiled my mood. The idiot so-called-University management!! F.U! Never saw a sucks "high-class?" management before... Last minute announce that need to pass up this and that and WHAT?? Due by that day 5p.m.??!!! And it's 4.30p.m.!! How the heck I "blink" out all those stuffs to you, faggots-.- Asked why the shit happened yet only get the answer, "Oh, we have upload it on the portal just don't know what's wrong with the server...So don't blame us and yourself. We've done our parts and it's understandable that you students don't know about this. Nevermind, we postponed it till Friday before 12p.m. :)" ..."How about those back home ones?"..."No worries, tmr is thursday and public holiday, sure got lots of time to do those things and now the management is trying to re-upload the files."....(silent)"How the hell they do the job while all go for holiday tmr?" I asked myself. (Well, just see on it.)
As what "somehow" my prediction, the portal still the same as usual-shitting downgrading?- should I call....whatever, I've planned to go to campus the next day in early morning.
Seriously, don't ever try to do this if you're the type can't stand still after just having 1 1/2hr slp, I slpt at ard 5 am? Then I woke at ard 6.30am.Seriously you won't feel the zombieness till ard noon time. And then, I can't stand anymore and went home to get more slp. Well, that day's not my day-.- The car somehow slightly banged by another noob car. Only license "P" yet still wan doo those shitty things and banged me. Well, I saw from the side mirror and seems ntg wrg thus I just str8ly went home while tat shit noob car slowed down.
That day, I'm supposed to have classes from 2.30pm. but I guessed I made wrong investment and caused me skipping them until the evening kitchen class. Before I went to campus again, I tried to check on car again...Shit!! my car's hurt...cabai...couldn't notice from side mirror yet when taking closer look, that's kinda hurt...-.-If got the chance and I still rmb, gotta do something about it before return the car to my bro...
Kinda refreshing when I reached the campus yet met with a lecturer who I supposed to attend his class??!! Well, I "explain" the reason to him and thanks God he let me go...Then, the kitchen class started. Overall, shitty result for me was all I can said....Argh....feels like everthing's killing me T.T
And lately, lady luck seems like no longer with me or should I say that never with me? Somehow, 3rd tide's coming soon on me??? GAHHHHH NO~~~~~.~ How many times would I be trapped then I really fed up and giv up???!!!!! This is really something's wrong man!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
On wednesday, it was supposingly a quite nice day yet some shits happened and spoiled my mood. The idiot so-called-University management!! F.U! Never saw a sucks "high-class?" management before... Last minute announce that need to pass up this and that and WHAT?? Due by that day 5p.m.??!!! And it's 4.30p.m.!! How the heck I "blink" out all those stuffs to you, faggots-.- Asked why the shit happened yet only get the answer, "Oh, we have upload it on the portal just don't know what's wrong with the server...So don't blame us and yourself. We've done our parts and it's understandable that you students don't know about this. Nevermind, we postponed it till Friday before 12p.m. :)" ..."How about those back home ones?"..."No worries, tmr is thursday and public holiday, sure got lots of time to do those things and now the management is trying to re-upload the files."....(silent)"How the hell they do the job while all go for holiday tmr?" I asked myself. (Well, just see on it.)
As what "somehow" my prediction, the portal still the same as usual-shitting downgrading?- should I call....whatever, I've planned to go to campus the next day in early morning.
Seriously, don't ever try to do this if you're the type can't stand still after just having 1 1/2hr slp, I slpt at ard 5 am? Then I woke at ard 6.30am.Seriously you won't feel the zombieness till ard noon time. And then, I can't stand anymore and went home to get more slp. Well, that day's not my day-.- The car somehow slightly banged by another noob car. Only license "P" yet still wan doo those shitty things and banged me. Well, I saw from the side mirror and seems ntg wrg thus I just str8ly went home while tat shit noob car slowed down.
That day, I'm supposed to have classes from 2.30pm. but I guessed I made wrong investment and caused me skipping them until the evening kitchen class. Before I went to campus again, I tried to check on car again...Shit!! my car's hurt...cabai...couldn't notice from side mirror yet when taking closer look, that's kinda hurt...-.-If got the chance and I still rmb, gotta do something about it before return the car to my bro...
Kinda refreshing when I reached the campus yet met with a lecturer who I supposed to attend his class??!! Well, I "explain" the reason to him and thanks God he let me go...Then, the kitchen class started. Overall, shitty result for me was all I can said....Argh....feels like everthing's killing me T.T
And lately, lady luck seems like no longer with me or should I say that never with me? Somehow, 3rd tide's coming soon on me??? GAHHHHH NO~~~~~.~ How many times would I be trapped then I really fed up and giv up???!!!!! This is really something's wrong man!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sunday, January 9, 2011
destroyed?
just pass through the 1st week of the last chapter of diploma story. PHEW.....diu....feels like my confidence had lost!!!OMG to myself~ 1st, kithcen practical class, stress and other negatives conditions were expected before it yet never thought it would even have the potential to destroy me!!! ARGH... and 2nd which was also the last for now, a really other GODLIKE thing or mission to do--entrepreneurship....man! never know that it would soooo challengings---10 pages for 5 questions only for the assessment 1, and then the business plan. from what i know so far from the class, this time will be a GG? darn....really felt that i'm goona be destriyed...can i really pass through this last chapter and then graduate peacefully?? :(
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
HELLO
say HELLO to last chapter of Diploma story; say HELLO to my friends again after 1-week-termbreak; say HELLO to stress; say HELLO to whole new self and TO whole new self, "are you there?" XD
Friday, December 24, 2010
DELETE...Goodbye
Woohoo, finally term 5 final assessment had ended, and seriously HOPE CAN PASS hehe~
And 1-week-termbreak starts. Feels like it's gonna quite "fullfilled?" as if not wrong, this year's ending, so hardly can see my family n I will welcome 2011 at West M'sia. Of course, all come for my granpa's birthday!! haha...HAPPY BDAY TO MY GRANPA!
Btw, this term concluded kinda sad I think. Since term 4, it's kinda complex or hard to say I'd got a feeling on someone. Then during that term, I failed. That time, I decided to forget it yet when came to this term-term 5, thought I would change the way to treat her as friend since found that she's kinda lonely in the class (can said I thought too much, but then seriously, human can't just simply delete the feelings as long he/ she alive and got the feelings on others eh...
Which meant, I falled again, to the hole, deepy and uncontrollable. Just couldn't stop see her status on FB, updates on blog or what-so-ever related therewith, just like drug addictor. And whenever she replied the messages, I felt so happy and those times were the times I felt motivated and "alive".
I thought i would have a chance again. Yet due to last experience, my style and some circumtances, I had the struggles in the mind and heart. Desire and desperation (should I said, had won.
Then, as we can never know what's the others' thinkings, same goes to me. She was so "uncatchable", sometimes good in mood, sometimes kinda anger/ moody. And lately, found that she had some kind like "unnerving" problems perhaps? That's when I started again my thoughts, was I the one made her feel unnerving? ARGH...well....Then, something happened. And maybe I had somehow knew it or prepared for it which that thing would gonna happened somehow, as also because of my fault on annoying after my consideration on my actions those times, I did something.
I knew I wouldn't be able to forget her or stop thinking her. Thus, I tried this, maybe as my last option and it's rare or first time for me to do those. I deleted her number, FB and msn contact so hopefully I can forget about her by not noticing any of her latest news or whatever.
I knew my heart was raining and separating into pieces when I did those things yet I had to. BECAUSE maybe her style was just not suitable with mine even my everthing was so in her already. Oh God, if she was not meant to be with me, please assist me in anyways k! Or else I knew that whenever she has a single simple motive of contact with me in future, I may even fall again and trapped in the blackhole and it will be more tragic if the fact is "I'm just a tool for her".
SERIOUSLY HOPE THAT'S A UNRETURNABLE GOODBYE TO HER AND FORGIVE MY COWARDNESS OR WHATSOEVER THAT I'D DONE....
And 1-week-termbreak starts. Feels like it's gonna quite "fullfilled?" as if not wrong, this year's ending, so hardly can see my family n I will welcome 2011 at West M'sia. Of course, all come for my granpa's birthday!! haha...HAPPY BDAY TO MY GRANPA!
Btw, this term concluded kinda sad I think. Since term 4, it's kinda complex or hard to say I'd got a feeling on someone. Then during that term, I failed. That time, I decided to forget it yet when came to this term-term 5, thought I would change the way to treat her as friend since found that she's kinda lonely in the class (can said I thought too much, but then seriously, human can't just simply delete the feelings as long he/ she alive and got the feelings on others eh...
Which meant, I falled again, to the hole, deepy and uncontrollable. Just couldn't stop see her status on FB, updates on blog or what-so-ever related therewith, just like drug addictor. And whenever she replied the messages, I felt so happy and those times were the times I felt motivated and "alive".
I thought i would have a chance again. Yet due to last experience, my style and some circumtances, I had the struggles in the mind and heart. Desire and desperation (should I said, had won.
Then, as we can never know what's the others' thinkings, same goes to me. She was so "uncatchable", sometimes good in mood, sometimes kinda anger/ moody. And lately, found that she had some kind like "unnerving" problems perhaps? That's when I started again my thoughts, was I the one made her feel unnerving? ARGH...well....Then, something happened. And maybe I had somehow knew it or prepared for it which that thing would gonna happened somehow, as also because of my fault on annoying after my consideration on my actions those times, I did something.
I knew I wouldn't be able to forget her or stop thinking her. Thus, I tried this, maybe as my last option and it's rare or first time for me to do those. I deleted her number, FB and msn contact so hopefully I can forget about her by not noticing any of her latest news or whatever.
I knew my heart was raining and separating into pieces when I did those things yet I had to. BECAUSE maybe her style was just not suitable with mine even my everthing was so in her already. Oh God, if she was not meant to be with me, please assist me in anyways k! Or else I knew that whenever she has a single simple motive of contact with me in future, I may even fall again and trapped in the blackhole and it will be more tragic if the fact is "I'm just a tool for her".
SERIOUSLY HOPE THAT'S A UNRETURNABLE GOODBYE TO HER AND FORGIVE MY COWARDNESS OR WHATSOEVER THAT I'D DONE....
Monday, December 20, 2010
Few more days to end term 5
Really...time passes real fast. Until now, it's few more days to say "bye bye" to term 5 and followed by one-week-term-break then start the last term of diploma---term 6. Guess it's gonna be a challenging term. Can graduate or not will be depended on this coming term 6's final exam. Yet before that, have to survive through this coming final assessment to conclude the term 5's life.
Rewinding the memories, though the life of diploma costs only for 2 and 1/2 years to finish, a short duration I bet, but somehow feel that the life of diploma is more exciting? memoriable? compared to my secondary school life as that costed 6 years. So can know that it doesn't matter how long the moment we're having together but the most matter with us is how we create more memoriable things.
Thus, seriously, feeling freaking sad when comes to think that going to graduate in no longer future since may be not really available to meet the colleagues in future as everyone will have their own paths to go on...
Some of them may continue for further like degree and so on while some of them may straightly start working or travelling more places. As for me, I'm still not really sure what shall I do after this diploma life. Should I continue? Work? Travel to see more things I never see before? I don't really know...
Besides, since the last time freaking long moment of keeping someone in the heart while that someone with the another, I don't feel motivated in my life. Maybe I'm too eager to be loved or concerned. Somehow kinda hate this "me". Yet lately, there's one that I seriously supposed to let go or forget or give up quite a moment ago, I found that she's unforgettable. She used to be the one of my hatred list? But now feel soulless when she absents or etc. Somemore, starting to feel motivated by just looking the smile or wat so ever. Also, don't know since when, feaking scared and worry if she is upset? mad? or...?
However, i guess my characteristics still as usual, provoke or hurt someone unconsciously, wanna change but again, the pride problems-.-....Yet somehow, start to feel that as like I able to show the softer side, though the speed of the change is very slow.
I guess for the present "me", feeling like wanna be with her anywhere and anytime even knowing that the major problem--communication will be a disaster if we really get together and following her choice for future path may seriously change my future unless I'm interested and available to make the same choice as hers as well or else it will be too unwise to do so.
But watodo? Now seriously, should I say I'm blinded? ARGH
Rewinding the memories, though the life of diploma costs only for 2 and 1/2 years to finish, a short duration I bet, but somehow feel that the life of diploma is more exciting? memoriable? compared to my secondary school life as that costed 6 years. So can know that it doesn't matter how long the moment we're having together but the most matter with us is how we create more memoriable things.
Thus, seriously, feeling freaking sad when comes to think that going to graduate in no longer future since may be not really available to meet the colleagues in future as everyone will have their own paths to go on...
Some of them may continue for further like degree and so on while some of them may straightly start working or travelling more places. As for me, I'm still not really sure what shall I do after this diploma life. Should I continue? Work? Travel to see more things I never see before? I don't really know...
Besides, since the last time freaking long moment of keeping someone in the heart while that someone with the another, I don't feel motivated in my life. Maybe I'm too eager to be loved or concerned. Somehow kinda hate this "me". Yet lately, there's one that I seriously supposed to let go or forget or give up quite a moment ago, I found that she's unforgettable. She used to be the one of my hatred list? But now feel soulless when she absents or etc. Somemore, starting to feel motivated by just looking the smile or wat so ever. Also, don't know since when, feaking scared and worry if she is upset? mad? or...?
However, i guess my characteristics still as usual, provoke or hurt someone unconsciously, wanna change but again, the pride problems-.-....Yet somehow, start to feel that as like I able to show the softer side, though the speed of the change is very slow.
I guess for the present "me", feeling like wanna be with her anywhere and anytime even knowing that the major problem--communication will be a disaster if we really get together and following her choice for future path may seriously change my future unless I'm interested and available to make the same choice as hers as well or else it will be too unwise to do so.
But watodo? Now seriously, should I say I'm blinded? ARGH
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